When Silence Becomes Survival

When someone is unnoticed by people around him/her for most of their lives,they shape themselves into an introverted and silent person. The same thing happened with Aryan in the book Shame wears my name. He was ignored, misunderstood, and emotionally alone which affected his whole personality. 

Just like all children, Aryan also expected his parents to appreciate his achievements, but that rarely happened. His parents were’ not cruel, they were just emotionally unavailable which made Aryan feel like his emotions didn’t matter. 

This story shows how a parent’s behaviour towards his/her child makes a huge difference in how their child feels. When small emotional details are ignored, big damage is done. For a child, constant comparison, pressure and expectations are not easy to handle, such incidents in Aryan’s life made him a silent person which resulted in his silent sufferings because he slowly learnt that staying silent was safer than expressing his feelings. 

As the story progresses, shame slowly becomes a part of Aryan’s identity. Small incidents and ignored emotions build up inside him, making him feel like something is wrong with him, but the truth is that nothing was wrong with him, the way people treated him was wrong. 

What makes the story powerful is its realism. The book does not rely on dramatic events instead, it highlights everyday moments that many people may relate to. 

By Misha Vaghasia